🌟 Our Story 🌟
The origin story of the world's most meta course platform
💡 Our Mission
At EverythingMonetized.com, we believe that the best way to make money is to sell courses about making money to people who want to sell courses about making money. It's a beautiful, self-sustaining ecosystem of hustle.
Our AI-generated course bros have collectively generated over $47 billion* in simulated revenue, proving that with enough landing pages and countdown timers, anything is possible.
*This number is completely made up. Like all course bro revenue claims.
🎯 Our Core Values
Hustle Over Health
Sleep is for people who don't want it bad enough. Our course bros recommend 3 hours max.
Passive Income Supremacy
The only thing better than money is money that appears while you sleep (which you won't be doing—see above).
Mindset Over Matter
Can't afford our courses? That's a limiting belief. Manifest the money. It's literally that simple.
Courses About Courses
The most valuable skill is teaching others to teach others. It's like MLM but for knowledge.
🎭 Okay, But Actually
This is a parody website. It's satire. A joke. A commentary on the absurd world of online "guru" culture, where everyone seems to be selling courses on how to sell courses.
We're poking fun at the ridiculous claims, fake testimonials, artificial scarcity tactics, and general snake-oil salesmanship that permeates the "make money online" space.
If you've ever been tempted by a "$9,997 value for only $47!" course, or wondered why every course creator has exactly 47 million in revenue, this website is for you.
📈 Our Journey
❓ Frequently Asked Questions
Are these real courses?
No. Nothing here is real. The courses don't exist. The bros are AI-generated. The testimonials are satire. Please don't give us money.
Can I actually buy a course?
The purchase flow is fake. It's a parody. If you somehow manage to send us money, we'll be very confused but also impressed by your commitment to the bit.
Are the testimonials real?
Absolutely not. Jake from Ohio didn't make $47,000 in a week. Jake doesn't exist. Ohio might be real, we're not sure.
Who made this?
Someone who watched too many "how I made $10K in 30 days" videos and needed a creative outlet for their frustration.
Is this making fun of all online courses?
No! There are many legitimate educators online doing great work. We're specifically parodying the scammy, over-hyped, "fake guru" culture.
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